Jackson, MI

You know, I never really realized how much I hated being here until I had to come back. And I'm not sure if it's because of the reason for my return to this town, the fact it wasn't for a nice visit instead it was for my sister's death, or if it's because of a different situation that arose out of that one, but I've spent the last few days thinking about nothing else but going Home.
Home is Portland, Oregon.
That is where I want to be right now.

What I'm worried about is that I know Mike wants to come back here for a visit soon, but I'm not certain I want to come back anytime soon at all. If he really wants to and we have the money, I will for him. Mostly because I know he isnt at all comfortable with flying.

some good has come of this, though...
I'm talking with Matt and Arnie again. It was a really awsome feeling to have the three of us sitting next to each other again for the first time in 2 years. I'm going to miss them a lot but at least I will be able to keep in touch with them now.
Charity, Missy and Jeremy all paid their respects at Aambers Memorial and it was great to see them as well. Even Beth and Jenny showed up, I've got to get ahold of them all before I leave...

But even with all this good I'm still very much wanting to go home. I don't like being here at all, especially since I can't call Aamber up and hang out with her as I did before I moved. I don't like being the Only One in this town. I don't like these feelings inside of me right now and I think it will be best if I deal with them at home where I'm more at ease.

I -- I just want to go home.