Thoughts on Things

It's been a few days since my last posting here and I figured I could do one today since I have a few moments.
So, it's been over 2 months since I lost my sister, Aamber, and I would have thought the simple passage of time would make things better. But, it seems, it doesn't.
One of the good things about being a Gemini is the ability to look at both sides of almost any issue including yourself. I know that in the last few weeks I've been sliding into a nasty depression. One minute I'm doing fine, laughing and joking with Mike and the next I'm face down on my bed crying.
This past week has been the worst. I haven't been able to be in a 'good mood' for very long and the other night Mike and I went to see the advanced screening of Flight Plan and I was actually getting very pissed off by simply sitting on the MAX and doing nothing. Noone was annoying me I was just getting pissed.
We saw the movie, it was alright...at least worth a free rental, and on the way home I had to fight the urge to breakdown and cry but when we got home I couldn't keep it together anymore and cried for about an hour.

I don't recommend that. It starts to hurt after the first half hour.

Thing is, I used to be able to hide for hours in my Comic Books and that worked fine. Now, I don't have most of my collectiong with me and I've found I haven't the intense interest in them I once had. I know this is due to sadness or depression or whatever you want to call it. I find some release with them though and still enjoy collecting them.

It's just a weird feeling, being sad almost all the time, and I'm looking forward to when it starts to ease and fade some. I know it won't go away completely but it would be nice to have some solid good feelings in me again.